The curse that no one talks about

Last time Jason was deployed I listened as an army wife shared that during a previous deployment her basement had flooded a few days (or weeks?) before her husband returned. She didn't want to deal with it so she closed the basement door and left it. Some how her husband had forgiven her and the mess/damage had been taken care of. Can you IMAGINE that conversation?

I couldn't stop laughing when I heard the story. I wasn't laughing at her. I was laughing because I could see myself in the story. I completely understood that sort of resignation and denial-that feeling of "nope, I'm not going to deal with this."

This was also my first time hearing about what I now call the "curse". No one talks about it. No one warns you. But it happens. There is a strange thing that happens when soldiers deploy. Their homes start falling apart in unexpected ways. Suddenly things break that had been working for YEARS. Problems creep up that you never even considered a possibility.

When Jason was at military training last summer I had unexpected visitors. MICE. We had NEVER had ANY sign of ANY pest in our home. I hate mice. When I was 12 I went to Girl Scout camp and there was maybe a mouse in our cabin-we couldn't be sure. I refused to sleep in my bed. Two friends pushed their bunks together and let me sleep in between them.

I didn't think I could expect my dog and daughter to sleep next to me and keep away the mice. But I wasn't about to face the mice or do anything about them. I started out by ignoring the problem. I hadn't found enough mouse poop to prove that a whole family of mice had been gorging themselves on the giant bag of abandoned dog food in a basement closet (what were we THINKING?). My headlights hadn't caught a mouse scurrying along the house ledge as I pulled into the garage. I couldn't hear mice squeaking and plotting how to take over the world when I walked in and out of the house. Nope. It wasn't happening. Everything was normal. I certainly couldn't SMELL mice. That must be the dog. Or me. Maybe I better shower again.

Although I didn't do anything about the mice, I did talk a little about them. I told my family and even Jason about them. I also told them about my denial and my refusal to do anything. They'd occasionally ask questions like, "Seen any mice?" "Set any mouse traps yet?" My mother found it hard to believe that I could HEAR mice. (Okay, okay, I'll admit I couldn't understand them, but I COULD hear them under the step into the house!) When people realized that I really wasn't doing anything about the mice, they started offering to help.

The offers to help and the fact that I was starting to obsess about mice (Was that one? Are they upstairs now? Should I move out until Jason gets home?) reminded me that I needed to pull myself together! I am usually a little hard headed about accepting help. I take pride in being independent.

After a lot more whining, I finally put my fear of mice aside, threw out the remaining dog food, vacuumed up the mound of mouse poop, bought 3 mouse traps, filled them with peanut butter, and set them out. Then the dog and I settled in for a night of TV. About 2 hours after setting the traps it got dark and we heard, "SNAP"....."SNAP"....."SNAP" within a 5 minute time frame. We just looked at each other. Then I turned the TV volume up and went back to my happy place of denial.

The next morning, I held my breath, kept my feet out of the path of any scurrying mice and checked the basement closet and garage traps. All 3 traps had dead mice in them. (I'm sorry to any strong animal rights activists reading this. You can come humanly remove the mice if they invade again. I wasn't brave enough for that. I did avoid sticky traps because I had heard those could cause mice to die slowly over a few days of being stuck.) After I had confirmation that the traps worked, I put on rubber gloves, got a huge garbage bag, and made the dog stay nearby. Then... I did it. I emptied everyone of those reusable snap traps with my head turned away and eyes closed. I shivered, squealed, and screamed. Then I sealed the bag and threw it in the dumpster and scrubbed by hands... twice. The whole procedure took at least 30 minutes. Not including the morning of psyching myself up for the task. But that didn't matter. I had faced my fears, opened the closet door, and started a war on mice.

I continued catching mice. There was one day the fear came back and my dad had to come empty 2 traps, but I did manage to do the rest on my own. I caught TEN mice during the 2 weeks Jason was gone. I found the last one in a trap the morning after Jason returned. I emptied it (without gloves and taking a minute or less) and thought, "Jason can take over the mouse war tomorrow." Well, go figure, there were no more mice the next day or the next. Jason had returned and the mice knew it. The curse had been lifted.

This time soon after Jason left, our garage lights flickered out. Then the hallway and kitchen bulbs burned out. I told my brother about it. He claimed light bulbs do that. I claimed it was the curse of deployment. The screws in my house are also loosening, especially on door knobs. I've tightened them twice since Jason left. I don't think he was regularly tightening screws when he was at home. I also don't think someone is secretively loosening them now. Its just the curse. That's okay loose door handles are easy to fix. I'll take them over mice any day.

I know I'm not the only one affected by the curse. My friend's house was invaded by squirrels and a NEST of their babies (found under her sink). That wouldn't have happened if her soldier was home. I'm not trying to be sexist. I don't know any military husbands, but I wouldn't be surprised if it happens to them too. It doesn't have to do with the wives not being able to fix it (WE CAN!), its just a curse. An inevitable part of deployment, right?

Okay, so I'm being a bit silly. But it seems like the best explanation. Plus it makes facing the falling apart house a little more manageable and even fun. Its not my fault things fall apart, but its up to me to fix them...or ignore them. After all, I am working against a CURSE, I can't reverse ALL of its effects. So, I'll choose which problems I fix. Just last week I heard a rodent or bird in the garage. I'm still ignoring that, but my screw driver is on hand for loose door handles and my light bulbs are all working... for now.

I'd love to hear your stories!